Imposter Syndrome is NOT a virtue. False Humility is NOT a virtue.
Originally written: Oct 17, 2022
You need to celebrate your victories!
You see, I’m celebrating this achievement. I worked hard and I sacrificed, and it came together in a strong way.
We celebrate one another so much, but when we achieve the same things and we reach our own goals, we won’t celebrate. I sometimes hear folks brush away their achievements with “I got lucky,” or ”I can’t take credit.” If you don’t own those victories, your mind will categorize that accomplishment as a fluke. It won’t be repeatable, because you’ve told yourself that’s not who you are.
Instead, you need to celebrate!!!
You need to burn that victory into your self image so that your subconscious can pull it out on demand. This is something that you can do! And it’s just like you to do such a feat!
How is it that you can cheer on others with so much vigor, but you can’t cheer yourself? If one of your friends had accomplished what you did, wouldn’t you cheer them on? Wouldn’t you celebrate them?! Do it for yourself too!!
It sometimes feels wrong to celebrate because it looks like bragging, and we don’t want ego to take over. We need to stay humble, but don’t sell yourself short.
To yourself it looks like bragging but no, it’s not bragging. The difference is timing. Bragging happens when it’s not appropriate. It comes off as self-serving when the timing isn’t right. Sometimes it’s not appropriate to talk about your sub-second draw or your 1.80 Bill Drill. There are times when it fits, but when it doesn’t, that’s bragging.
“Well I don’t wanna brag, I’m really not that good.”
That’s what I would tell myself and it’s misled. It’s not that I lied, but I ignored this whole mountain of evidence to the contrary. There are matches and classes and exercises and force-on-force scenarios and tournaments and everything imaginable that said I was an excellent shooter and an effective coach. And I ignored them. We call that False Humility and that’s worse than Impostor Syndrome. It’s harder to fix because you’ve already ignored all this evidence. If anyone had achieved the same feats, I’d acknowledge them for what they are. But when I did the same, I would downplay them. That’s not a healthy way to treat myself. It held me back from accomplishing my own goals.
You can stay humble, and succeed at the same time. You can celebrate your victories without bragging about them. It’s good for your mental health and your self image.
False Humility and Impostor Syndrome are NOT virtues!!! They are character flaws.
So when you do well, you need to celebrate that shit!!! Catch yourself in the act of doing something right!
Because that’s who you are.
*Special thanks to Gabe White of Pistol Shooting Solutions. He's been coaching and mentoring highly-effective practitioners for over 15 years at this point, and he's very good at it. His coursework lays out some major mindset gut-checks and some serious goals that have become the industry standard. Go seek him out and try his Pin Tests. https://www.gabewhitetraining.com